This file includes Reality and Responsibility. Also see Acceptance, Emotional Health and Scrapping Difficult Times.
- Be careful what you wish for, you might get it.
- The best way to predict your future is to create it. (Peter Drucker)
- Don't be afraid of the space between your dreams and reality. If you can dream it, you can make it so. (Belva Davis)
- Every time I close the door on reality it comes in through the windows.
- Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian. (Dennis Wholey)
- Facts are stubborn things.
- Fiction reveals truths that reality obscures. (Jessamyn West)
- The future is something that everyone reaches at the rate of 60 minutes an hour, whatever he does, whoever he is. (C. S. Lewis)
- God grant me the serenity to accept the people I cannot change, the courage to change the one I can, and the wisdom to know it's me.
- I have a firm grip on reality. Now I can strangle it.
- I would rather have delusions than illusions. Delusions are harder for other people to destroy. (Denny)
- If you always do what you have always done, you will always get what you have always got. (Dr. Phil)
- If you want your children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders. (Abigail Van Buren)
- I'm tired of reality...I want my fairy godmother!
- Imagination is the one weapon in the war against reality. (ules de Gaultier)
- It IS as bad as you think, and they ARE out to get you.
- It is difficult to say what is impossible, for the dream of yesterday is the hope of today and the reality of tomorrow. (Robert H. Goddard)
- Life is like an onion; you peel off one layer at a time and sometimes you weep.
- Life is not fair. Get used to it.
- Losing an illusion makes you wiser than finding a truth. (Ludwig Börne)
- Modern man lives under the illusion that he knows what he wants, while he actually wants what he is supposed to want. (Erich Fromm)
- The moment we're born they try to make us cry, and sometimes it seems as though they never stop.
- The problem is not that there are problems. The problem is expecting otherwise and thinking that having problems is a problem. (Theodore Rubin)
- My reality check bounced.
- Okay, who put a "stop payment" on my reality check?
- The only thing standing between me and total happiness is reality.
- The perception is that a lot of things happen to us along the way; the reality is that we happen to a lot of things along the way.
- The pessimist complains about the wind; the optimist expects it to change; the realist adjusts the sails.
- Reality bites...and doesn't let go.
- Reality bites!...and I have the teeth marks to prove it!
- Reality is for people who can't handle science fiction.
- Reality is just a crutch for people who can't deal with drugs.
- Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one. (Albert Einstein)
- Reality is not always probable, or likely. (Jorge Luis Borges)
- Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away. (Philip K. Dick)
- Reality is the best possible cure for dreams. (Roger Starr)
- Reality is the leading cause of stress amongst those in touch with it. (Jane Wagner)
- Reality is the only obstacle to happiness.
- Reality is the world with a lack of background music.
- Reality leaves a lot to the imagination. (John Lennon)
- So it's not home sweet home...adjust!
- Sometimes you have to look reality in the eye and deny it.
- There are only 2,000 real people in the world; the rest are bad special effects.
- There is a fine line between dreams and reality, it's up to you to draw it. (B. Quilliam)
- Thy fate is the common fate of all; Into each life some rain must fall. (Henry Wadsworth Longfellow)
- To ignore the facts does not change the facts.
- To be always ready a man must be able to cut a knot, for not everything can be untied. (Henri Frederic Amiel)
- The trouble with people is not that they don't know but that they know so much that ain't so. (Josh Billings )
- Warning: This person reads fantasy and is an avid denier of reality.
- We don't see things as they are, we see them as we are. (Anaïs Nin)
- We get to choose our actions. We don't get to choose the CONSEQUENCES of our actions.
- We say that things happen to us along the way but in reality we happen to things along the way.
- What goes around, comes around...
and will whack you on the back of the head when it does.
- When you blame others, you give up your power to change. (Douglas Adams)
- While we are free to choose our actions, we are not free to choose the consequences of our actions. (Stephen Covey)
- The world is a dangerous place to live; not because of the people who are evil, but because of the people who don't do anything about it. (Albert Einstein)
- You can do something in an instant that will give you a heartache for life.
- You can get all A's and still flunk life. (Walker Percy)
- You can have anything you want--but you can't have everything you want.
- You can't wake a person who is pretending to be asleep. (Navajo Proverb)
- You shouldn't be so eager to find out a secret. It could change your life forever.
- Your life can be changed in a matter of hours by people who don't even know you.
Those Who Smile Too Much are Probably Fools
(Mike Royko, 24 March 1987)
One of my fondest curb stone theories has recently been confirmed by genuine scientific research.
It has to do with why some people are chronically grouchy and depressed while others are always bubbling with enthusiasm and looking at the bright side of life.
A psychologist took a close look at students who fell into both groups. He wanted to see how they reacted when they got poor grades.
He found that those who had the gloomier outlook of life generally blamed only themselves for their sub-par performances.
In contrast, those who bounce happily through life with big smiles on their faces usually found some other reason for their failings. They blamed teachers for not doing a good job or for being unfair, or they said that something had distracted them, prevented them from doing their best work. In other words, it wasn't their fault.
After analyzing the excuses of both groups, the psychologist found that those who tended to be gloomy were right--they had been at fault.
In contrast, the happiness-mongers were kidding themselves.
They, too, were at fault, but they couldn't accept it, so they found someone else to blame.
Thus, the study came to the conclusion that those who were gloomy and depressed had a far more realistic view of themselves and life in general.
But the happiness-mongers had a tendency to be unrealistic.
This is what I've always believed: Show me somebody who is always smiling, always cheerful, always optimistic, and I will show you somebody who hasn't the faintest idea what the heck is really going on.
And that most maligned creature, the chronic grouch, is depressed because he knows that there's a lot to be depressed about. He knows that every dark cloud doesn't necessarily have a silver lining.
It's more likely that the cloud contains acid rain.
. . . try looking at the pictures of the happy show-biz people who are always being shown in People magazine attending parties. Of course they look happy. Between the hooch and the powder they are snorting, they don't know which of their ends is up.
Contrast their facial expressions with those you see in the morning on commuter trains, buses and behind the wheels of cars. These people know exactly where they are and where they are going. They are going to work. That is reality. And that's why they're not giggling.
So I hope the above-mentioned scientific research helps put an end to the idea that people who smile a lot are in some way better than those who frown.
The scientists might even consider Slats Gronick's theory that smiling is unnatural, that it defies nature, while frowning is natural since gravity pulls our faces downward.
"If nature wanted us to smile all the time," he has said, "then we would have been born with our heads upside down."
That is something to think about.
Songs about Real
- Ain't Nothing Like the Real Thing - Donny and Marie (1976)
- All I Want for Christmas is a Real Good Tan - Kenny Chesney (2003)
- Are There Any More Real Cowboys? - Randy Travis (1985)
- Are You for Real? - Joe Cook (1953)
- Come Let Me Hold You for Real - Stu Phillips (1993)
- He's Not for Real - Priscilla Mitchell (1967)
- Here in the Real World - Alan Jackson (1990)
- I Want to Be a Real Cowboy Girl - KG and the Ranger (1996)
- If This Ain't the Real Thing - Les Taylor (1991)
- In a Real Love - Phil Vassar (2004)
- In Real Life - Ed Hunnicutt (1984)
- It Ain't Real if it Ain't You - Mark Gray (1983)
- My Love is Real - Joe Hinton (1961)
- My Real Name - Fats Domino (1962)
- On a Real Good Night - The Maines Brothers Band (1981)
- R U 4 Real? - Dr. John (1974)
- Real Bad Blues - Brent Mason (2006)
- Real Cowboy - Billy 'Crash' Craddock (1980)
- Real Deal - Baker and Myers (1995)
- Real Emotional Girl - Randy Newman (1983)
- Real Fine Place to Start, A - Sara Evans (2005)
- Real Fright - Iron Butterfly (2007)
- Real Good, Feel Good Song - Mel McDaniel (1988)
- Real Good Man - Tim McGraw (2003)
- Real Good Night - Davin James and the Bullnettle Band (2001)
- Real Good Thing - Kimber Clayton (2007)
- Real Life Ain't That Way - Jay Ferguson (1979)
- Real Life Dreams - Bernie Worrell (1991)
- Real Life (I Never Was the Same Again) - Jeff Carson (2001)
- Real Live Girl - Steve Alaimo (1965)
- Real Love - Bob Seger (1991)
- Real Man - Billy Dean (1998)
- Real Mean Bottle - Kid Rock and Bob Seger (2006)
- Real, Real Gone - John Lee Hooker (1954)
- Real Rockin' Daddy - Hoyle Nix and His West Texas Cowboys (1955)
- Real Roses - Burl Ives (1970)
- Real Story, The - Sylvia (1996)
- Real Thing, The - Kenny Loggins (1992)
- Real True Love - Tommy Tucker (1967)
- Real Wild Child - Ivan (1958)
- Real Women Drive Pickup Trucks - Nick Nicholson (2008)
- Sing Real Loud - Lloyd George (1962)
- Smart Woman in a Real Short Skirt - Jimmy Buffett (1988)
- Something Real - Shana Petrone (1999)
- Sure Feels Real Good - Michael Peterson (1999)
- This Love is Real - Jackie Wilson (1970)
- This Love's for Real - The Impressions (1972)
- This Time it's for Real - Southside Johnny and the Asbury Jukes (1977)
- Until the Real Thing Comes Along - The Dominoes (1954)
- Was it Really Real? - The Outsiders (1966)
- We All Had a Real Good Time - Edgar Winter Group (1972)
- What Happened to the Real Me? - Mavis Staples (1970)
- You Never Forget a Real Good Thing - Glen Bailey (1985)
- You Never Miss a Real Good Thing Till He Says Goodbye - Crystal Gayle (1977)
Songs about Reality
- Enter Reality - Kristilyn Robertson (2007)
- Even Though (Reality) - Aaron Neville (1961)
- Familiar Reality - Dr. John (1971)
- Nightmare of Reality - Memorial Day (2005)
- Reality - Wes Henderson (1969)
Songs about Really
- All I Really Need - Raffi (1996)
- All I Really Want to Do - Cher (1965)
- All That Really Matters - Richie Sambora (1998)
- Are You Really Mine - Jimmie Rodgers (1958)
- Baby, We're Really in Love - Hank Williams (1952)
- Back When it Really Mattered - Tommy Roe (1987)
- Boy, I Think it's Really Love - Rock and Rollers (1958)
- Do You Really Have a Heart? - Pollution (1971)
- Does Anybody Really Know What Time it is? - Chicago (1971)
- Does He Really Care for Me? - Ruby and the Romantics (1965)
- Goodbye isn't Really Good at All - Don Williams (1974)
- He Don't Really Love You - The Delfonics (1966)
- I Never Really Stopped Loving You - Cathy Carr (1955)
- I Really Do - The Five Echoes (1954)
- I Really Don't Want to Know - Charlie McCoy (1972)
- I Really Got the Feeling - Dolly Parton (1979)
- I Really Love You - The Ambassadors (1969)
- I Really Want to Know You - Betty Cody (1953)
- I'd Really Love to See You Tonight - England Dan and John Ford Coley (1976)
- I've Really Got a Right to Cry - Dee Mullins (1959)
- If it's Really Got to Be This Way - Bill Kirchen (2006)
- If You Don't Really Love Her - Karen Brooks and Randy Sharp (1992)
- If You Love Me, Really Love Me - Lamar Morris (1971)
- If You Really Love Me - Stevie Wonder (1971)
- If You Really Want Me to, I'll Go - Doug Sahm (1974)
- In a Really Big Way - Richard Berry (1961)
- Is it Really Love at All? - Eric Andersen (1972)
- Is it Really Over? - Jim Reeves (1965)
- Is it Really You? - Fanny (1973)
- Is This Really Love? - Don Gardner (1970)
- It Doesn't Really Matter Why - George Fox (1980)
- It Never Really Ended - Cissy Houston (1977)
- It's Really Goodbye - The Newbeats (1967)
- Love is All That Really Matters - Kevin Sharp (1998)
- Nothing Really Feels the Same - Lou Rawls (1965)
- One Who Really Loves You, The - Mary Wells (1962)
- Really Blue - Andy Stein (2003)
- Really I Do - Greg Wilson (2000)
- Really Rosie - Carole King (1975)
- Really Scary - Jeff Lorber (1984)
- Really Wanna Know You - Gary Wright (1981)
- She Really Lied - Allen Reynolds (1962)
- She's Not Really Cheatin', She's Just Gettin' Even - Moe Bandy (1982)
- Someone Who Really Does - Tony Booth (1975)
- Sometimes Mother Really Does Know Best - Christine Lavin (2004)
- This Time We're Really Breaking Up - Troy Shondell (1961)
- Was it Really Real? - The Outsiders (1966)
- We Really Shouldn't Be Doing This - George Strait (1998)
- Were You Really Livin' - Brother Phelps (1994)
- What I Really Mean - Robert Earl Keen (2005)
- What I Really Meant to Say - Cyndi Thomson (2001)
- What We Really Want - Rosanne Cash (1990)
- When You Dance You Can Really Love - Neil Young (1970)
- You Can Get it if You Really Want it - Desmond Dekker and the Aces (1970)
- You Must Really Love Me - Reba McEntire (1988)
- You Really Didn't Mean it - Carolyn Franklin (1970)
- You Really Had Me Going - Holly Dunn (1990)
- You Really Haven't Changed - Johnny Carver (1973)
- You Really Got Me - The Kinks (1964)
- You Really Know How to Hurt a Guy - Bob Beckham (1967)
- You Really Let Yourself Go - Bruce Robison (2006)
- You'll Never Really Know - The Marcus Brothers (1965)
- You've Really Got a Hold on Me - Mickey Gilley (1984)
Songs about Facts
- Cold Hard Facts of Life - Porter Wagoner (1967)
- Facts About Cats - Timbuk 3 (1986)
- It's a Scientific Fact - Tom Glazer (1959)
- Known Facts - Cornelius Bumpus (2000)
- Matter of Fact, A - The Knickerbockers (1968)
- Advice is what we ask for when we already know the answer but wish we didn't.
- Don't fool yourself that important things can be put off til tomorrow, they can be put off forever or not at all.
- Don't go around saying the world owes you a living. The world owes you nothing. It was here first.
- I do not believe in a fate that falls on men however they act; but I do believe in a fate that falls on them unless they act. (G. K. Chesterton)
- If you are not willing to take responsibility for what you do, then don't do it.
- In my day, we didn't have self-esteem, we had self-respect, and no more of it than we had earned. (Jane Haddam)
- Never put off till tomorrow what you can avoid altogether!
- No snowflake in an avalanche ever feels responsible. (Stanislaw Jerzy Lee)
- Our background and circumstances may have influenced who we are, but we are responsible for who we become.
- Responsibility is the price of freedom. (Elbert Hubbard)
- The true meaning of life is to plant trees, under whose shade you do not expect to sit. (Nelson Henderson)
- We are responsible for what we do...unless we are celebrities.
- The world needs anger. The world often continues to allow evil because it isn't angry enough. (Bede Jarrett)
It's not enough to have a dream,
unless you're willing to pursue it.
It's not enough to know what's right,
unless you're strong enough to do it.
It's not enough to learn the truth,
unless you also learn to live it.
It's not enough to reach for love,
unless you care enough to give it.
Basic for Responsibility
(from the book "Finding a Poem")
IT is a very useful word.
IT can do many things.
IT cannot shine,
the sun does that.
But IT can rain,
and IT can snow.
IT can look like trouble ahead.
IT can look like the end of non-violence.
IT can even look like another war.
I would not want IT to happen,
and you would not want IT to happen,
but we have nothing to do with IT.
IT is not my fault
any more than IT is your fault.
IT is nobody's fault.
IT is just the way things are.
That is the way IT goes.
IT goes by itself.
We do not have to approve of IT.
We do not have to do anything at all about IT.
That is the best way for IT to grow.
This is a story about four people named
Everybody, Somebody, Anybody, and Nobody.
There was an important job to be done and
Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it.
Anybody could have done it,
but Nobody did it.
Somebody got angry about that,
because it was Everybody's job.
Everybody thought Anybody could do it,
but Nobody realized that Everybody wouldn't do it.
It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody
when Nobody did what Anyone could have.
I Can't Believe We Made It!
According to today's regulators and bureaucrats, those of us who were kids in the 30's, 40's, 50's, 60's, 70's or even the early 80's, probably shouldn't have survived.
Our baby cribs were covered with bright colored lead-based paint.
We had no childproof lids or locks on medicine bottles, doors, or cabinets, and when we rode our bikes, we had no helmets.
Not to mention the risks we took hitchhiking . . .
As children, we would ride in cars with no seat belts or air bags.
Riding in the back of a pickup truck on a warm day was always a special treat.
We drank water from the garden hose and not from a bottle. Horrors!
We ate cupcakes, bread and butter, and drank soda pop with sugar in it,
but we were never overweight because we were always outside playing.
We shared one soft drink with four friends, from one bottle,
and no one actually died from this.
We would spend hours building our go-carts out of scraps and then rode down the hill, only to find out we forgot the brakes.
After running into the bushes a few times, we learned to solve the problem.
We would leave home in the morning and play all day, as long as we were back when the street lights came on.
No one was able to reach us all day. No cell phones.
We did not have Play stations, Nintendo 64, X-Boxes, no video games at all, no 99 channels on cable, video tape movies, surround sound, personal computers, or Internet chat rooms.
We had friends! We went outside and found them.
We played dodge ball, and sometimes, the ball would really hurt.
We fell out of trees, got cut and broke bones and teeth, and there were no lawsuits from these accidents.
They were accidents.. No one was to blame but us.
We had fights and punched each other and got black and blue and learned to get over it.
We made up games with sticks and tennis balls and, although we were told it would happen, we did not put out any eyes.
We rode bikes or walked to a friend's home and knocked on the door, or rang the bell or just walked in and talked to them.
Little League had tryouts and not everyone made the team.
Those who didn't had to learn to deal with disappointment.
Some students weren't as smart as others, so they failed a grade and were held back to repeat the same grade.
Tests were not adjusted for any reason.
Our actions were our own. Consequences were expected.
The idea of parents bailing us out if we got in trouble in school or broke a law was unheard of.
They actually sided with the school or the law.
This generation has produced some of the best risk-takers, problem solvers, and inventors, ever.
We had freedom, failure, success, and responsibility --
and we learned how to deal with it.
Please pass this on to others who have had the luck to grow up as kids before lawyers and government regulated our lives for our own good!!!